“On New Year’s Eve, I was in bed. I’d spent the evening with Pame and the rest of my family on the Upper East Side, and slid easily into the role of the youngest; my first role, my greatest. The television glowed at the foot of our bed and a deeply orange Dave Clark soldiered on. Ryan Seacrest popped up, announcing a live performance from LMFAO. These idiots came on and that song started. Ha ha ha ha, that’s who LMFAO is! Are these guys in costume? Are they Latino? I need to know this, so I can gauge how embarrassed I should be. What is happening with those clothes? Where are the gerbils? OMG, they are dancing like the gerbils! J opines that it straight up sucks. I went yesssssssss but no, it’s got that part, that part that saves it. Then I made the sped up keyboard noises. It’s so stupid and simple and perfect for the dance floor. I danced to it again the next day on our way out the door doing a modified running man in my winter wear. That night, I played the video for my friend Jared and he got that special look on his face that he reserves for Coldplay and covers done in tasteful Bossa Nova style.”